Monday, April 04, 2005
I Am Fucking Old..Here's Proof
Yesterday, my bright ass decided that I would wash my OWN car. Fuck paying someone 25 bucks to clean it for me..I will do it my fucking self because I am still 20 years old (NOT)..which is exactly the last time I washed my own fucking car. Just picture this...I have a mini van, it is white..well yesterday it wasthis color with about 40 million stuck on gooed on BUG GUTS on the front of it. I live out in the woods and bugs are fucking ridiculous out there and they just seem to gravitate towards my little white Mazda MPV. Little fuckers.
Anyway, I decided that I would wash it yesterday. BIG MISTAKE..somebody please kick my silly ass right in the ass cheek.
It took me 2 HOURS to wash that bitch. 2 FUCKING hours of my life..wasted on washing the MPV that I hate anyways. That is why I don't wash it, b/c I HATE IT.
Can I just say that I feel like someone gave me the the ass kicking I deserve for all the mean shit I have done to people over the years except instead of being in my ass the pain is in my back and my arm is so sore from scrubbing off the bug guts that I can barely type this to you right now. My body is failing me. Please make it stop. Tell it to be good to me for a couple 20 more years at least. I am 28 for Christ sake.
You can bet your honkey ass one thing...Next time...OH WAIT..there won't fucking be a next time..I am taking that little white whore of an MPV to the car wash. I could have been sitting on the couch for those 2 hours watching TV.
I learned my lesson.
*Mrs. Pissy said fuck 6 times in this post.
7 Comments:
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dashababy commented at 5:41 PM~
Oh God your funny, you make me laugh. Thanks. Old, shut up.
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commented at 9:00 PM~
LOL, saying fuck 6 times in 1 post is that a good thing or a bad thing? I think it added to the post-made it more real.
Nice pic of the Tenn sky! Nice pool too!-
Random and Odd commented at 12:32 AM~
you've said fuck more times in one comment on my blog.
You're slackin' girl.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.
There, beat that.-
Shelli commented at 1:52 PM~
OMG I'm dying....
I was driving into work today thinking, I am gonna wash my nice WHITE fucking truck tomorrow...borrowing an extension cord from my father to use my own mini vac to get between those crevices we all love to hate, that NO VACCUUM known to MAN can get into...get those stale french fries and fruit snacks up outta there, wash the bug guts off the front spoiler where they love to be laid to rest!! lol. Um, after reading your post i am thinking well i'll be a monkeys wife....i am gonna rethink this whole process. better yet i am gonna do it and come up with a greatass post for tomorrow night or thursday...this should be interesting...
Next time find that stuff called "goo gone"...it sounds funny but it takes ALL the bugs off...easily...and rub it on people's mouths when they start talking shit too..shit ..go byebye...all gone!! lol
oh and kristine? FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK...
beatcha!!!-
The Merry Widow commented at 7:12 PM~
Fuck to the infinity power! (OMG, that was so nerdy of me to say. I better go watch some MTV now to balance things out.)
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Big Heavy commented at 1:33 PM~
friggin' wuss... pimp some teen to do it for you in exchange for some mrs. robinson action.
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butterstar commented at 9:06 AM~
how in the FUCK have I missed your blog?? I've seen your name around lots but somehow missed this awesome blog action. The look is kick-ass (S&K got it going on) and I love the fuck-meter.
You've inspired me to go wash my car now. Can't imagine why, but for some reason I think this is not the correct affect this post should be having on me.
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