Thursday, June 01, 2006
Picture This...
Pissy, standing in the Target..looking at baby wipes...thinking..hmmm..Huggies baby wipes are cool, Huggies baby wipes are on sale. Yeh, I shall buy Huggies baby wipes today.
Remember..Pissy is just standing in the isle looking at ass wipes.
Pissy has on heels today.
Pissy never really wears heels anymore. And after today, that will probably will turn into NEVER EVER fucking wears any kind of shoe with a heel on it.
Pissy falls in the fucking floor of the Target flat on her big fat ass and screams "OWWWEEEEEEE" as she is hitting the floor and her legs are flying up over her head.
Seriously, I am not shitting you.
How can you just be STANDING still and fall on your ass? Can someone answer me that please? And the sad thing is..when I fell I just sat there for a minute b/c I couldn't fucking believe that my fat ass had just fell in the fucking floor of the Target. Instead of jumping right up and acting like it didn't happen. I just sat there.
This really did happend to me yesterday at lunch.
IN THE TARGET. (did I mention I was in the Target?)
In the diaper isle.
And yes, some bitch over in the movie section with her 2 screamin' toddlers heard me say "OOOWWEEEE" and saw me fall in the floor and saw my legs fly over my head.
She pretended like she didn't see me and kept on shopping.
That is what I would have done too.
Bitch.
Oh, and I just wanna say..that I own this..like Kristine talks about on her blog today..but I thought to myself.."self, if your damn kid was potty trained, this wouldn't have went down because you wouldn't be in the fucking diaper isle."
Fuck.
That is all.
24 Comments:
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Chickie commented at 10:30 PM~
Oh damn. Hope your pride was the only thing hurt!
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pack of 2 commented at 10:39 PM~
Damn Pissy! That sucks Girl! And in the diaper aisle in Target.
Shel says to sue their asses!;)....it's a thought.
Big Pissy hugs to ya. We heart you!
Shangie-
Elizabeth commented at 10:50 PM~
The diaper aisle. That is priceless. That woman should have totally helped you up.
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Summer commented at 4:36 AM~
She just walked away???? Bitch.
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Monogram Queen commented at 8:15 AM~
Oh lordie I hope you weren't hurt! Um, you were probably thinking hard about whether to buy the lavender wipes or the shea butter wipes is how you fell. Yeah, that's it!
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dashababy commented at 9:00 AM~
Say goodbye to the heels. Glad you didn't get hurt.
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Madame D commented at 2:18 PM~
I'm still stuck on...standing still=falling. It's like "if a tree falls in the forest..." blah blah.
An eternal mystery.-
Random and Odd commented at 3:06 PM~
OH.
MY.
GOD!
I am laughing my ass off!!!-
Kat commented at 3:32 PM~
I hate when stuff like that happens! That's pretty much how I felt when I fell off my seat on Friday... She could have at least thrown out a 'Are you okay...'geez
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Deodand commented at 7:29 PM~
I have sort of weak ankles, and the same thing happens when I wear high heels. I go flying for no reason at all.
Which is why I would've asked you if you were OK...-
Summer commented at 8:23 PM~
Where is that woman we all stalk in all of this? Is she all laid up in bed letting her mama take care of her kid?
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Firestarter5 commented at 5:35 AM~
Silly Pissy. You should have stayed down there. You should have informed Target that you tripped on either a loose floor tile or some water on the floor, and to avoid a fucking lawsuit they would have given you a bunch of diapers for free!
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Michele in Michigan commented at 9:43 AM~
omg
I feel your pain, but I havta admit that I am chuckling at the vision of you with your legs over your head.
And I'm proud of you owning that YOU woulda done the same thing that WOMAN WIF DA KIDS did. Still, bitch shoulda axed if you were ok THEN left.-
commented at 2:40 PM~
What kind of heels were they?
Not like stripper heels were they with goldfish in 'em? That woulda sucked to break one of those heels off and have a fish under your ass...ya know what I'm sayin?!
Coulda been worse Pissy-you coulda been wearing a dress.-
Kami commented at 11:37 PM~
OMG.
I SWEAR I didn't laugh.-
Tina commented at 3:25 PM~
You know that bitch with the two screaming kids, went around that corner and fucking fell out laughing at your ass falling. Shit I didn't even see it and I'm sitting here laughing....love you, but I'd pay 1000.00 dollars to have seen it...
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Shelli commented at 9:22 PM~
holy shit that made my fucken day.
If I were that bitch ass lady...i woulda at least asked if you were ok?! what the fuck?
ugh, that is SOOOO something that would happen to me, only I'd be in the tampon isle with thong panty liners in my hand or something....
Did you hear that? 8 final episodes of the sopranos next fucken season...did that just not make your day or what?-
Forest Lady commented at 7:53 AM~
Falling is always funny, unless you're the one doing it. Believe me, the kid will get potty trained sooner or later. Teenagers don't get many dates when they wear diapers.
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limpy99 commented at 3:53 PM~
I'm not laughing at you I'm laughing...
Ahh, fuckit. I'm laughing at you.-
Pissy Britches commented at 4:30 PM~
I have been enjoying all your comments over the last several days.
You crazy bitches.
I am glad you found the humor in it.
So do I.
Mr. Pissy did not think it was funny..he was concerned that I had a stroke or something.
He kept saying..."that is just not normal to just fall down in the middle of a store"
Ha.-
Kathryn commented at 2:44 PM~
Oh girl.
That's all.-
Shelli commented at 11:07 AM~
Stick a syringe into mr pissy with a whole fuckload of hormones in it and then let him tell you it's "not normal"
hahhahah!!-
Kate Michele commented at 9:53 AM~
LOL... Man, I think yorgurt just flew out of my fuckin' nose girl!!!
More important... You should of spilled something on the floor and then blamed them for falling on your ass.... At least get some moolla out of it!!!-
Reighnie commented at 3:51 AM~
I read the post above first and thought...geez, sounds like she's having my life...but when I read this one! Ohhh...girl do I know.
You say how can you be standing still and fall on your ass? I'm still trying to figure that one out. I took my fall at Michael's. I still don't know what the hell happened and that was like 5 years ago.
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